Propositum

I went through something rough. I let myself get put through something rough. It is my fault for staying in an abusive relationship but the ...

The rose

My office was in a place with only two parking spots. It was a startup and we had this old garage space for an office. So, I parked wherever in downtown Mill Valley I could be closest to my office. When I left work that evening, I walked past a florist that had a whole street display. They had these giant white roses. I thought how great it would be to greet Luz with one of these when I got home. I went in and got one of these roses, found my truck, and headed home taking special care not to crush or damage the rose in any way.

I got home, got out of my truck, and went into the condo. When I found her I handed her the rose. She did not take it. She just said, "that's weird." I was taken aback and asked, why is that weird. She just repeated herself and then walked away.

For more than a week, she treated me as if I had done some horrible thing. At various times I begged her to talk to me—to tell me what was going on or at least explain what was "weird." She just ignored me, hugged the wall in the hallway if we were walking down it at the same time, went to bed at night and closed the door early making sure I knew I was not welcome.

After more than a week of this, I demanded she tell me what was going on. I begged her to explain why she is behaving the way she was. She just started screaming at me that how could I not know why that was weird. She screamed it repeatedly and I tried to reason with her but that was not possible.

I should have left. This was insane. I just gave her a rose and she turned it into weeks of pain, but again I stayed and hoped she would come back around. I knew all along that there was something seriously wrong with her, but I would cover that knowledge with my efforts to try to not offend her again. But this was absolute folly since there was no predicting what would trigger her next episode of paranoid delusional jealousy.